The Great Sadness

I have witnessed once again a returning glimpse of what I call The Great Sadness. Fortunately it has returned as only a shadow of it's former self. I first encountered The Great Sadness when my eldest child, Bailey, left for her first year of college at the University of Missouri, 10 hours away.

It's that old struggle of loving children, raising them to become independent and then grieving the very thing you hoped to accomplish...their successful departure.

Grief and sadness are like waves that engulf you. While the many joys of watching and listening as your daughter embarks on a new adventure and the happiness upon happiness of realizing how well prepared she has proven to be for the next chapter are rewarding they are also fleeting. I have to chase down and bring my attention to the "bright side" of Bailey's departures while the darkness of loss jumps on top of me unbidden. The nature of joy seems to be more and more intentional the older I get. I have found it is essential to make the effort.

This has been one of many partings since the first great departure several years ago and so it is easier and now I am not engulfed by The Great Sadness, I just live in it's shadow for a few days and renew my commitment to chase down all that is good and joyful in this life.