Thursday, April 26, 2012

thoughts on Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott



I am always unsure if I should recommend one of Anne Lamott's books. There is enough really good insight and abrupt humor to make her books worthwhile to me. On the other hand some of her humor is a little raw, her take on Christianity is very off-beat, and she's sometimes a little "out there".

In the past I have read her books on faith: Traveling Mercies and Plan B: Further Thoughts on Faith. I would describe them as insightful but different, not your typical Christian books. She has also written several novels.



Bird by Bird is about writing but is also about life in general. Often, in the book, I would read a sentence  about the struggle to write and I would think you could take it out of context and it would be good advice for life in general or any other struggle.

The first piece of advice that could apply to anyone is "never start a large writing project on any Monday in December". This is good advice for any project. In addition to all the holiday obligations and expectations December is a "month of Mondays, Monday's are not good writing days".

The first thing Lamott tells her writing students on the first day of class is that "good writing is about telling the truth". With the exception of being a law enforcement officer or FBI agent this is also good advice for anyone. There are a few other exceptions like politician and car salesperson but really if you think about it - things would be better if they told the truth as well.

More advice to writers: "You are desperate to communicate, to edify or entertain, to preserve moments of grace or joy or transcendence, to make real or imagined events come alive. But you cannot will this to happen. It is a matter of persistence and faith and hard work. So you might as well just go ahead and get started."   Isn't this also true of most things? Most people in business and services are trying to get events to come alive, trying to produce something, fix something, sell something. Most of us need in our life and work to communicate effectively. And for most of us "persistence and faith and hard work" will see us through to our goals.

The title of the book comes from a time when Lamott's brother had put off for three months writing a report on birds. The report was due the next day.  The ten year old was feeling the pressure and close to tears for the large and looming task ahead. His father advised him: " Bird by bird, buddy. Just take it bird by bird." Good advice for writing and good advice for life. Give us THIS DAY our daily bread.. One day at a time.

If an author can be articulate, insightful AND funny it delights me! I think this is funny:

"I know some very great writers, writers you love who write beautifully and have made a great deal of money, and not one of them sits down routinely feeling wildly enthusiastic and confident. Not one of them writes elegant first drafts. All right, one of them does, but we do not like her very much. We do not think she has a rich inner life or that God likes her or can even stand her. (Although when I mentioned this to my priest friend Tom, he said you can safely assume you've created God in your own image when it turns out that God hates all the same people you do.)."

It both comforts and disturbs me that I relate so well to what goes on inside her head:

"Left to its own devices, my mind spends much of its time having conversations with people who aren't there. I walk along defending myself to people, or exchanging repartee with them or rationalizing my behavior...I speed or run an aging yellow light or don't come to a full stop and one nanosecond later am explaining to imaginary cops exactly why I had to do what I did, or insisting that I did not in fact do it."

 I'm not saying Lamott is mentally healthy and stable...I'm just saying I can relate!

On why we read and why we write Lamott says:

"So the acknowledgment that in the midst of ourselves there is still a good part that hasn't been corrupted and destroyed, that we can tap into and reclaim, is most reassuring. When a more or less ordinary character, someone who is both kind and self-serving, somehow finds that place within where he or she is still capable of courage and goodness, we get to see something true that we long for." 

I must include two of her very funny musings on memory or the lack thereof :

First, "I think that if you have the kind of mind that retains important and creative thoughts --that is, if your mind still works--you're very lucky and you should not be surprised if the rest of us do not want to be around you."

Second, " If your mind is perhaps the merest bit disorganized,...It may be that you've had children. When a child comes out of your body, it arrives with about a fifth of your brain clutched in its little hand..." I do not know why this is true but it is!!

Another piece of Lamott's advice taken from the movie Cool Runnings and referring to being published as opposed to not being published also applies to almost anything strived for in an attempt to be validated and approved. In Cool Runnings, the coach of a Jamaican bobsled team tells his desperate athletes that "If you're not enough before the gold medal, you won't be enough with it". I want to write this on my hand and look at it every day. It isn't that I have aspirations of winning a gold medal or even of having something published but I do let my mind covet some sort of stamp of approval. It may be some insecurity left over from childhood or it could be the remnants of the mommie wars (working moms vs. stay-at-home moms) but I need to remind myself that I am enough without the rubber stamp of approval!

When asked why writing matters Lamott confirms my point, "When writers make us shake our heads with the exactness of their prose and their truths, and even make us laugh about ourselves or life, our buoyancy is restored. We are given a shot  at dancing with, or at least clapping along with, the absurdity of life, instead of being squashed by it over and over again.

The final line in the book" "It's like singing on a boat during a terrible storm at sea. you can't stop the raging storm, but singing can change the hearts and spirits of the people who are together on that ship." True for writing, true for life.

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